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Men are often reluctant to talk about their needs in intimate
relationships. Whether social conditioning or an inability to
communicate our needs are to blame, men (who tend to be the less
communicative partners in intimate relationships) are prone to silently
suffering when their emotional needs aren’t being met by their partners.
Whether you are a man or a woman reading this article, this will give
you greater clarity into yourself /partner and what your/their needs are
in your intimate relationship. Let’s put an end to the needless
fighting due to miscommunication, the unnecessary s*x-less nights, and
the verbal shut-downs. Read through these tips and I promise you’ll
never regret it and without further ado let’s take a Closer look at
our seven things men want in a relationship. Continue reading........
NUMBER 1
PRAISE AND APPROVAL
Men
have infamously tender egos. We need frequent reassurance about
ourselves, our career paths, our efficacy as partners, our s*xual
prowess, and our attractiveness (among other things). I have countless
male clients telling me every month that their partners rarely let them
know what they like about them. While it may be true that men need
relatively less frequent verbal praise than their female counterparts,
this isn’t the kind of gesture that requires keeping score. Why not just
have more of a good thing? So ladies, let your praise loose. Tell your
man exactly what you find attractive about him. Let him know what
physical features of his are your favourites. Tell him how attractive
you find it when he says something a certain way, when he accomplishes
something, or when he takes you on a date. Your praise won’t make him
cocky; it will help him feel loved. And (bonus) the more you praise his
positives, the more you will see them. Continue reading........
NUMBER 2
RESPECT
Men
feel respect as love. If he feels like you disapprove of him, his
career, or the things that he believes to be integral to who he is as a
person, he will have a hard time trusting and loving you. The thought
process behind that being “If she doesn’t respect who I am at my core,
then how can she really want what is best for me?” If a man’s partner
doesn’t respect his path or mission in life, then he will find it very
difficult to feel anything other than an anxious need to distance
himself from her. Continue reading........
NUMBER 3
A SENSE OF S*XUAL CONNECTION
Men
and women both connect through s*x and communication, but generally,
women connect better through communication and men connect better
through s*x. Does this mean that men need to have s*x with their
intimate partners every day in order to feel connected? Not necessarily.
Men, more often than not, connect through indicators of s*xuality just
as much as they do through s*x. Allow me to explain… Often, a man will
initiate s*x just to make sure that you are still s*xually available to
him. So, to my man-loving readers out there, if he reaches across the
bed for you, even showing the willingness to embrace him, to kiss him
deeply, and to engage him could be enough to make him feel loved (not
that the follow through isn’t enjoyable). This lack of awareness around
women needing to connect through words and men needing to connect
through s*x can sometimes turn into an unfortunate and rapid downward
spiral. She doesn’t feel like oP**ing s*xually until she feels connected
to him, but he finds it difficult to communicate with her because they
haven’t been physical with each other in days. Talk with your partner
and ask what specifically helps them feel the most loved so you can
avoid these unintentional standoffs. Continue reading........
NUMBER 4
EMOTIONAL INTIMACY
From
a very young age, men are taught to avoid appearing weak at all costs.
Perceived “weakness” includes things like complaining, divulging fears
or concerns, and expressing self-doubt or worry. A man’s partner is his
safe space to fall. He can expose the cracks in his armour and allow his
partner to help him heal. Just as women need to slowly open up s*xually
within a relationship, men open up over time emotionally. He needs to
make sure that when he first cries in front of you, you won’t be
repelled or handle it poorly. If you push him away or are unable to be
nurturing when he needs it the most, he will no longer trust you with
his emotions. He will remove himself somewhat from the relationship. In
this instance, both partners lose- he goes on silently suffering and
believing that he is flawed in his imperfection, and she is held at
arm’s length emotionally.
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Wednesday, April 22, 2015
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